~I want to Fly Away_______~

2006-01-28T23:10:00.000+08:00

Today...fun? fun? yes FUN!

Well, i start off my day pretty bad. I haave to wake up early to clean my bookshelf,studytable. It was so dusty man. I can't help sneezing. HAHAHAH There were so much rubbish and dust and paper yikes..MATHS working paper. I threw them all away. Juz by looking at it, i ill have a very bad headache. HAHAHAH So i was forced by my dad to clean,. I started with the bokhelf. Took me about 3hours? i didnt knoe i have so much trash man. So much paper... So i ate my breakfast at 12+..more like lunch hahahaha...After that, i have to clean my study table and this was really BAD. It was super dirty,dusty. Disgusting. AND seriously i cant help sneezing. I discovered a spider too. EEEWW this is so sick and my dad killed it for me. May GOd bless the spider...HAHAHAHA . So i cleaned and cleaned and sneezed and sneezed..man and now i still cant stop sneezing. Aiya...sad la. So threw away a big back of trash..hahaha i cant believe i actually kept those trash for a year..hahaha. I ate lunch or teabreak at 4+..Aiya..its a sad life ma...

Reunion dinner was fun.
My family came last for the dinner. But that does not matter,they were all patiently waiting for us to start. hahaha..so we started and the yu sheng right, was somehow clean for me. i didnt get food all ver my arms. YAY!!! Well, my sis got food in her arm and my dad at his seat. Darn funny la..HAHAHAHA The dinner was good but fun part was the best. My uncle bought those yan hua or wadeva u call them and i actually played with them. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE..HAHAHAHA. AND IT WAS SOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNNNNNN!!!! U noe when the tip of the stick touches a fire flame, it will erupt and sort of release a sound like some kind of "bombing' noise. hahaha it was awesome man. After that, there will be fire sparks so called 'jumping' out of the the big ball of fire. Its like a dandelion when u blow at it, the little er flowers will er fly away,disperse from its u noe er original position. Yea,the fire sparks was like that. It was awesome man. At first,i was terrified to light that yan hua stick, ten it was quite malu cuz my cousins are like 9 years old and they are not afraid of the fire and here im sec3, terrified of fire. HAHAHAHa But anywa, i overcome my fear and di it. I had so much fun man. Today honestly,i will want to remember that moment forever in my life. Sad la, a girl with no childhood...

Rejoice man, soon it willbe a NEW year,where everything s full of hope. It like a new beginning.
So let me start afresh. Put the bad times behind,and start anew like a new lion cub, lost and surprised at everything it saw. Totalli new to the environment, with no experience at all. HAHAHAH IT DOESNT EVEN MAKE SENSE. lol.. Let me end this with a prayer: in the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit, Dear Lord,please guide and blessed me as this year arrive. May you forgive me for all my wrongdoings in the past.Thank for watching over me last year. you will always be assured that i am always with you. Amen. In the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit.

2006-01-27T23:23:00.000+08:00

Life has been difficult for me. january is coming to an end..the CAs are approaching. It has been most stressful for me. It has been my toughest month in my whole entire life. Maths has been bad..realli bad..aiya..so stressful.... I am terrified. Everytime, during maths lesson i always get distracted. Aiya. In the end, i dont know what the teacher is aying resulting in a downfall of my expectations. Sad man...

So i did some self-reflection and decided to pick myself up again. I will try harder next time. Practice until i understand the concept.yupp...don't understand ask and ask and ask. Sorry queenie(victim)/ HAHAHAHA. Never Give Up!!!! As long as you dont give up,there is still HOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today even though it was the eve of the eve of CNY,yet school was dismiss at 2+pm. Sad man. So lessons went on as per normal, no it didnt. Oh ya, during maths period, our class ate yu shemg man. HAHAHAHA funny especially when u need to lao tt time. It was damn disgusting. The contents were like dropping on my hand,everywhere, on my unifrom,table,floor. It was damn disgusting and funny la. HAHAHAHAHA . Fun man..it rox la. hahaha after that, everything went baack to as per normal. then we had the CNY performance. I don't think it was very entertaining,quite boring.. I only enjoy the anti-drugs dance only. So cooolllllll..LOL...hahaha..

I went to the library and PoPULAR bookshop after school. On my way back fromthe bookshop, i actuallt slept on the bus which i never did in my eentire life. I must be realli realli very jaded. Aiya funny man..............................................................................................

~if i can control my life and live the way i want to live it, it is immaculate.~

2006-01-01T23:03:00.000+08:00

arh!!! After such a long time......im FINALLY updating this going to die blog....hahaha..yeah i used to not give a damn about this blog. After a while, i found this to be soooooooo boring and ttiring. Sigh...so i got lazier and lazier and apparently not visit MY blog at all... I remembered the last time was Nov20..the last time i visited this blog...

Time flies and today is Jan 1 2006!!!! Wow a brand new year where everything begins fresh, where hope is once smelled. I hope this year will be a smooth ,exciting full of surprise year! I hope everything will be smooth for me..EVERYTHING..be it academic, CCA, health,frendship,development of character and of course my family...

School is reopening in 2 days time which is like so soon...shit...i don't really like my class..ALL my good frends are in another class..what is this man???? Life is soooooo unfair...This class does not seem to be united..i know it wont...aiya....I really $@!! this class....and yupp i haven complete my school homework yet which is like oh no!!!! =(

I went to canada this dec holiday. Boy i had fun..fun fun. hahahaha..I went to Vancouver then up to the Canadian Rockies. The temperature there when i first reach vancover it was freezing..i was freezing..then as ddays past by it became hottter and hotter Boy..it was suppose to be colder and colder..This is caused by the horrible exhaust fume...depletion of ozone layer. Mana sad sad sad....I saw majestic mountains and beautiful scenery..really it was awesome...I wish i could ski..then i will ski all the way from the peak of the moutain to the ground...Skiing must be fun..it looks fun of course i know dangerous too.. I saw snow too so much snow i ever see in my entire life..hahahhaha i saw snow on the ground and oh yea on the day when we were in Whistler, it was snowing man...It was wonderful...The snowflakes came down from the sky scattering all over me...It was brillant man..I love every second of it...I got food poisomn on the 3rd day of my road trip. Man it was horrible. I had to go to the toilet like a million times..i was weak and i had to eat bread all 3 meals for dunno how many days...it was like hell..hahahhahaha...luckily i recovered on the ast day or somewhere near that day. Overall, i tremendously enjoyed myself in canada and if i had a chance i will really recomend people to visit it. Canada Rawk!!!! =)

2005-11-20T21:55:00.000+08:00

Life is gooooooooodddddddd............life has been really deLicIouS......hahaha.......it seems that it has been following suit to my LiKinGs....YAY....that means triumphant!!!!!!!!!!!

AArHH...i just watched the tv premier of harry potter and the chamber of secrets. hahaha still soooooo entertaining though i say i must have watched it many times. Young Tom Felton still ever dashing..=D......hahahaha he is sooooooo coooooooollllll!!! BUt as he grew older, he does not seem to be sooooooo strikng anymore. hahahahaha....

Yesterday, i juz watched Harry Potter And the Gobert Of Fire. Hark!!!! It was funnny BUT i say the director has left out alot of parts fromt he book..didnt really follow the book...He EVEN alter some parts to suit the movie. HAix...and he cut sooooooo many parts...what's wrong with following the book? Fans don't mind staing in the cinema more than 2 hours for the sick of the movie. IT is such a pleasure to watch the movie. And of course,it will have been better if they follow the book and don't cut so many parts from the book. =D

The movie is good. I wanna watched it again and again. hahaha ...well at least i plan to watch it 5 times cuz it rock? hahahaha i wanna watch again. The question is who is willing to watch it with me...=0

2005-11-15T20:24:00.000+08:00

Today is a fun day for me. =) i bought my new school books all ready to go to school. hahaha... im mad.. im mad

some confessions to make
I LOVE XIU RONG!!!!! i LOVE X.R!!!! i LOVE HER!!!! I LOVE YOU L LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAHAHA im mad...but i no lesbo..hahaha cuz she saved me from a fact that i am about to loose someone frendship. She gave me courage to move on ...to explain to the person and i did it...........YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

aneway on a lighter note....i still cant help but rmrmbered the fact that Clasandra, Queenie,JoJo,Tracce, Yvonne and i wont be in the same class. Aiya. im toatlly splited from them which is like so sad..and the class im in..i dun hv any close frends in. I am so going to be a loner. EEwwwwwwwww i hate the sound of it. I imgained myself sitting alone nobody cares about me....eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww that is horrible. I guess i got to live with who im in class with..That seems to be the only way..perhaps it will not be as bad as i guess.............

2005-11-11T23:14:00.000+08:00

HA! Today was fun!!!!! Toatlli fun!!! Though it ended early but i still appreciate what happened today. I would not be enjoying myself if it wasnt for my dad. It was him who gave me permission to go out today. Thank you!!!! =)My mum didnt allow me to. Sign* when will she....

Today i went to plaza sing at 12.30. I am supposed to meet up with Tracce and Jojo. Tracce is sooooo blur. Don't even know where is Starbucks...haiz...So i went to the bus stop to wait for her. She came. Jojo was late so me and Tracce went to the cinema to buy tickets for the movie The Exorcism Of Emily Rose. Yupp we bought the tickets. Tracce paid for Jojo's share.I was to sit beside Tracce and Jojo the other side of Tracce. While waiting for Jojo to arrive, Tracce went to buy Grape flavoured Candy Floss. AND today is my first time eating Candy Floss [yupp..no childhood=( ] I dont like it personally. it melts in my mouth and is WAY toooooooo sweet for me. No Candy Floss for me!;)...haha finally Jojo arrived. It was 1. There was still time so we went to the Arcade next to the cinema. Tracce wanted to get those soft toys from these er weird machine where some metal thingy or grabber? will pick up the toy you have made it move to the area where the toy lies. Yupp Tracce spent $15 on 2 machines but to no avail. Poor girl..Jojo and I simply stood there laughing at her. hahaha

We went to the cinema. Then the movie started. the only scary part about the movie is when emily was not herself asif there was demons in her body. She looked VERY scary. Yupp other than that,the rest were plesant. I learnt some facts there. Quite interesting.... yupp so there was how the movie go. Everytime we know something bad will happen to Emily, i will use my hands to cover my eyes,Tracce will turn away or cover her face using her shirt and Jojo? She sat too far from me,i could not spot her. The sound effects were toooooooo real. They scared me out of my wits!!!! hahahaha

Then we went to the basement to eat lunch. Well,i wanted to but since they didnt want to,so i didnt. And Jojo wanted to go to the CD shop so we went up again. We lingered in the shop for quite a while before we went to the ground floor where we saw Kim NG and Bryam Wong from meidacorp. They were wearing some funny mini wings. hahaha. We left the building. I didnt want to go home. It was tooooooo early. So we stood at the open area discussing what to do next. I wanted to take neos but they didnt want to. So i volunteer to pay for everything and they just take with me. hahaha i need their faces. hahaha [make it sound like im using them]. We laughed and laughed and laughed.Then we went home....

When i reached home,i found out my granny has kept a bowl of mian sian for me to devour. I ate it hungrily. hahaha so this is what happen today .... fun issit it?

2005-11-06T22:40:00.000+08:00

today lets see today everything went normal..nothing extraordinary happen. kind of bored..i hate this lifstyle...now im super bored just waiting for 1am to come ..shyt another hour to go now im realli bored..........................

it is so exciting im goin to watch the Harry Potter And The Globert Of Fire movie..so exciting but i dun even know if it is going to be the movie or wad..hahaha but i hope is the movie.

yesterday i got a 'wake up call' from jeslyn. I was sleeping soundly when my sister woke me up. And jes say i have to get down to the UWC grounds now or i will die. i got a shock! i was like feeling sleepy and everything and when i heard that i am like totalli awaken. hahaha couldnt believe my ears and jes say i have to go or i will die. and its already 8.30am and the first match start at 9am. And i have to get tot the pitch now cuz got not enough players. I cant believe what im hearing. I quickly brush my teeth put on my sch t-shirt and asked my dad to fetch me totiong first to get my hockey stick. So then later from tiong we went to UWC. By the time i reached there it is 9.30am. So i am very scared i will get big time from my seniors and Mr Tan.
Mr Tan juz asked me why i late and those ques so i told the truth. Then they say the next game
is in i hour 40 mins time so i just sat there and wait and wait then it rained so it was delayed for 45 mins and im really getting very bored. Then when finallywe want to play,my senior Hema scolded me. I am guilty and i apologised to her and stuff like tha. yupp then we went to play with UWC. mr Tan let me try forward position and i like what i am doing. We won. Then we played another match and i play forward again i realli like wad im doing. hahaha then finally we can go back. it ended at about 1.15pm. I went back to tiong and ate lunch there then sleep the whole afternoon. Yupp there goes the day..

On fri nite,everything was settled. I apologised to my dad. Everything ended in tears..hahaha man i will never forget that day!!!!!!!!! Thank those who hear me out..thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And now i am waiting for the clock to strike 1am in the morning. here i am scarficing my sleep for Harry potter..how noble!!!!!!! hahaha =)

2005-11-04T22:28:00.000+08:00

Today is another sad sad day. I thought everything will resume. The relationship of a father and daughter would be strong forever but i was wrong. It seemed to me that it would be smashed into a thousand pieces of glass as clear as tears. Perhaps it was impossible for us to take a picture of us smiling,not even that. Everything was shattered, everything gone. Nothing will mend this broken father and daughter relationship nothing except a miracle. When i close my eyes and imagined the happy times we had, do you know how much it pains my heart and i will start to tear. Do you know that? When i imagined you smiled at me, do you know it was so perfect. I tried again and agin to start a conversation bt it seems that i was oblivious to you. It juzt seems that i die years ago and all you care is my younger sis. Do you know i feel so sad??? Why cant you give me another chance? WHY? WHY? WHY? Is it because

Cuz we lost it all

Nothing last forever

Im sorry i cant be perfect.

Now its too late

And we cant go back now

Im sorry i cant be perfect

it cant be due to that rite? This is Simple Plan's perfect chorus song. That is not true.P lease dad tell me that is not true!!!!!!!!!!!! Give me another chance. Talk to me.................

i know someday you will forgive me. But dad i hope that even if you do not ever one to forgive me, i hope you will accept my apology. You mean so much to me, you care for me the most better than mum and now that i lost you. It feels asif life is meaningless for me. What is the point of getting good results if their family dun celebrate with them? There is no more joy laughter and happiness. There is no more of that. Even if you only want to scream at me,i still will be happy cuz at least you speak to me and didnt treat me like im dead.

I know that will happen sumday........in a faraway land where everything ends with a happy ending..=)

2005-11-03T22:04:00.000+08:00

i hate myself...i realli do...i hate myself for causing so much trouble....for causing too much sadness...for causing too much disappointment.

Today i am suppose to meet queenie,clasandra,yvonne and may at somersat MRT station then we will go to Pam's house at Cairnhill. So for me the day started real bad for me. i dunno wad's wrong me. My dad went out to buy breakfast. He bought those raw hams with white bread. I hate this breakfast. But i remembered last time when my dad bought them i ate them with no complain but i dunno why today i couldnt stop moaning about it. I ate like i was force to and my dad saw it and he knew i didnt like it. But i still continued eating like i was chewing sum hoorible food and then the fatal bite came i dropped a piece of bread on the floor. That's it. My dad temper rose. He went mad. He scolded me and then ordered me to pick up that bread and throw it away and also clean the surrounding area. I dunno wad's up with me. I did it like fine-i-will-do-it this manner with very much reluctancy...and then when he ordered me to clean the surrounding area i didnt do it . For God knows why i stared at him and kept on staring and staring and them he said sumting and i wiped the areas. he then asked me to get out of the house. I didnt even finish my breakfast. So i went back to my room changed and went out off the house. i walked towards Somersat MRT station all by myself.

When i reached Somersat Mrt station, my mum called me many times many many times and most of them i hanged up. i dunno why. I was pesipiring like hell. Luckily the MRT is installed with air-conditioners. haha..and then i couldnt find my frends. I was expecting Queenie, May and Clasandra and they were now where to be found. So i stood there like a total idoit. And then they came. Queenie told me they were in that bookshop.hahaha...so they came and now we were waiting for Yvonne to arrive. She took ages to arrive. So in the mean time we started taking pics and more pic with may and my hp and queenie's camera. Hahaha it was fun. Yvonne finally arrive. Yvonne and i acted lesbians almost all the way to Pam house.She abandoned me foe Clasandra. How could she. Anyway, so we reached Pam house and we ate lunch there. After that, we walked to cineleisure wanting to catch 2.10 Sky High. Unfortunaetly for us, it was sold out. So we left the queue,walking to Lido theatre. We ended up watching the horror show Cello. And i was so freaked out everynow and then i need to use my hands to cover my eyes. It was horrible. Actually the film is not that scary i was just scaring myself. The plot really honestly SUX!!!!!!! I didnt like it at all. It was kind of weird and idun realli understand. It does not have a fixed ending so yea it was like that. After thee movie we went to Far East. It is my first time going there. hahah we took neos. and then we all head back to Pam house. she booked the activity room for us to use. There were tents and mirrors little tables and chairs it is like a playhouse for those small kids hahaha. Anyway there was a table tennis board there so i started playing table tennis with Yvonne as in i any how play i lost, play with Clasandra i won!!!, play with Queenie i think i won too. hahaha..so fun...and then we started fooling around. Soon it was for us to depart and we waved goodbye.

I started walking home. I was scared. Will my dad scold me? Will he kill me? Will he rip me apart? i am so scared. Soon i reached home. Everyting was fine. I didnt talk to my dad at all. Worst still, i made him angry at me. Shyt cuz i suddenly got angry when talking to my mum and refuse to go out and eat dinner. that's it i made my dad angry. so i very reluctanly left. shrugging my shoulders and walked in a according to my dad a ganster manner. he didnt like that. Great so he scolded me outside the lift lobby. And he was scary when i say it is rally scary and he does all the horrible things to you and say to. Eew i got scared,my mum is not helping me so i ran away from him and left the condo. i walked slowly and then i stopped at a crossroad i knew they were follow me. and thet did. My dad stood across the road fromwhere i am standing. I was lost scared. i knew i has dome sumthing veri wrong. i knew i was doom. But my mum pursuaded me to go back so i did. A few minutes later,my dad did the same. I was scared. I dunno what he will do to punish me. So far he hadnt but i know anytime now hee will. I am scared. During dinner we didnt talked at all so it was quiet. And now still. i dunno what to do .

(Scared and Lost in this dangerous society)
waiting for DOOM"S DAY...

if i can only let you know, i am sorry for all my actions. Please forgive me. I will try not to make you angry again.

2005-10-31T22:12:00.000+08:00

It was a dark night. The wind howled hard at the trees making it swayed violently. The trees rustled and the fallen leavesbegan to dance under the esclipse. There was hardly any light on top of the houses. Out of the blue, the galloping of horse carriages emerged from the dark alley. The movement was so quick that one could feel the wind brushed against their skin. The horse-rider then pulled the horse and it came to a sudden screech. The horse trampled wildly. The door carriage opened revealing a man. A man wearing a black hooded cloak. His facial expression was seriou and when one loked at it, they will feel their hairs were stand and they will let oout a scream;a silent one and then trampled to the ground. Dead

Today is halloween. Yet it sux and everyting when dreadfully wrong. Not almost...in the morining i was snapping pics here and there with my new fone yupp kind of fun and video taping crap? hahahaha..CLASANDRA U R HOT!!!!!!!!..U R LIKE THE MAIN actress in the video....HAHAHAHAHA so fun so fun

beneathe the skin of this little girl

lies a terrible truth

her secrets and troubles and problems

was not to be imagined at all

At every struck to midnight

she will glide towards the highest level of the towel

waiting for that special moment

where she will slit her wrist once more

and let the dirty blood flow through once more

and every sip she takes

her strength and power increased

and once more she will command her land

for she was the Queen Of The Dark

She will control

to give the worst to her people

for that was what the Queen does

and drink their blood is what she likes

Merciless and powerful

she conquers the lands by storm

her speech is like sand storm

her pace is like tornadoes

her army is like hurricane and earthquake

no wonder she doesn't fail

With her determination

she never fails to suceed

and hear her screeching laughter.

For now she is defeated

lying in her cove

waiting for Doom"s Day

Pitiness and laughter

were thrown at her

No more poise and dignity

just a little dirt

waiting to end her life

on a tall tower...

2005-10-30T22:30:00.000+08:00

arh...today..i woke up at 10am cuz i was super tired i dunno why..nowadays my body seem to loose alot of adolescene and im always feeling tired and sad..aiya i dunno y..depressed at upset at myself....i dunno why i keep on quarreling with my mum..i don't want that to happen seriously.i want a happy family..no noise but music....if only god will make that come true, life will be peaceful...no terroist..no bombings..no innocent lifes lost...no blood shed. if there was no misunderstanding and racistism, the world will be like one family living unitedly ,supporting each other and not afraid you will not have sumone to rely on. Today i spend more money again..my poor dad has to spend a huge sum of money to get what i want, ok not i realli want that but still it is one of my favourites and it cost a bomb. If my handfone need not be spoiled, i will not have to alter my hp...money could be spent on other more pratical objects like camera and stuff like that.

Thank you dad for buying me the things that i want,
thank you dad for scarificing for the sake of your child,
your kindness and benovolent will be paid off,
to a decent deed that you sure will received
from the Almighty Lord above,
you will be blessed with the goodness of the good
and the luckiness of the luck.
Your scarifice will be remembered to all
and not be forgotten as time past by
Your dedication and love
will be etched in the heart of your beloved daughter for always till the devil break us apart
but now i wish you will lead a healthy and wonderous life....

this above poem dedicate to my most beloved father

Mum i am sorry
for making you angry
for making you heartbroken
for making you dissapointed at your own child.
because of this i am sorry
sorry for bringing you sadness
for bringing you pain
for bringing you tears
Mum i am sorry
really sorry
i promise you to be a good and filial daughter
to respect and listen to you
to give you joy and laughter
to give you hope and peace
for i am your daughter
our bond will be together forever
unite as one
for i will not leave you when you are old
i will always be there for you
till i depart from this world
i will be there supporting you forvever
making us inseperable
and no one will find out our deepest secret
for our trust in each other is too strong to be break apart
As long as i live
you will have no worries for when i hear you calling for me
rest assured i will be there for you
i promise you
i will never leave you alone...
in the times when you need me the most.

This poem is dedicated to my most beloved mother and mum i apologised for makin you sad . I ma sorry i sincerly apologised to you. Sorry

whoa...i am really temperamental and emotional but these are true these are coming from the bottom of my heart

i really let down alot of people...like yesterday i didnt went for training cuz i woke up at 11am when my training ends..hahahaha on fri night i was idscussing with my er well-educated cousin on the subjects combination form till like 2am, didnt woke up on time..there goes my training. But when you think back it will be academic that is important in the end..some JCs don't see the CCA points....yupp...aiya i am indeed lost and confused at this moment.....gosh how am i going to make myself confidence again....

missing you alwaes..:)

2005-10-29T00:23:00.000+08:00

today is a surprise day for me...i am totalli taken back today....my chance for working towards my goal has become nearer and this certainly has boost my level of hope and opmistism even though i know in the end this dream is going to be shattered.

Today we had a concert in school and it is like quite ok...then we had to get our results
Reflections of this year final result
1) never be OVERCONFIDENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2)practice makes perfect
3) What you get is what you deserve

so i was pretty satisfied about this cuz whatever color form is given to you there must be a reason.

I went out with queenie, yvonne and lulu. We went to j8 cuz we were sick and tired of plaza singapore. When we reached there we went to buy the movie tickets first cuz it is 2pm and we were planing to watch flightplan which starts at 2.10pm. When we went into the cinema it was so fricking cold and the theatre was less than half full. Before the movie start, lulu and yvonne went to the toilet. I need to go to the toilet but i was too terrified of what i may happpen in the toilet so i choose not to go. Then the movie started it was not even interesting and the theatre is so cold that i can't stop shivering. So yupp it was like that. Then we started walking around like idoits going to basement and up again. hahahaha....then we took neos yupp then we went to the food court again then we went basement to look for food and yupp tt is about it and yvonne owns me 2.5o. hahahaha i shall be richer again..=) hahaha so this is how i spend my day today.....

getting my goal is the most important thing now, never give up, be consistant andd work hard. you will get what you DESERVE!!!!

2005-10-26T23:30:00.000+08:00

hey...i changed my blogskin to a harry potter one just to commenmorate the upcoming harry potter film Harry Potter And The Goblert Of Fire. It is going to be so HOT!!!!!!!..hahahaha....that is my most anticipated movie i have been waiting for. =)

Today....life is boring so boring...really i don't see the point of going to school wasting time...boo..it is bad everyday we do nothing but play cards and more cards....im sick and tired of this man...at least today not so bad ...Mr Tan let us watch the abortion tape..and it is not quite what i expected...cuz it is taken from the intrasound..so is like i odn't know where is the baby's eyes head and stuff like that ...but all i know is it is BAD to do abortion...the foetus is a living thing and it has developed the sensitive ceptors so it can feel the pain imagined being sucked into a vaccum machine and your skull being crushed...imaged all that pain..an innocent baby is experiencing....so all i can conclude is no abortion for me!!!!=)

Well, we watched White Chicks today too..funny ...hahahaha....and tommorow we will be resuming the movie..it will be my second time watching it....hahahahaha........

Oh ya....on tue i was so bored that during chinese period i compose a poem...here it goes....it sound stupid but so what?! i just wanna put it up...

I told you i will
but no words can be said to let you trust me again
why don't you believe me
why don't you care
why don't you look at me
i wonder why
why must you leave me
why must you go
why, why, why
i want to let you know
i care for you
i treasure you
i miss you
and most importantly
i love you....

hahaha so here it goes...this er..weird poem on my feelings during my chinese period ....not refering to anybody in particular..but maybe the last 6 lines dedicated to all my frends and family and god and everyone else..hahaha....

~SAiyO[n]Ra~

2005-10-14T20:10:00.000+08:00

and finally....the exams are over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yah!!!!! finally no more hours and hours of sleepless night, memorizing like shyt.....and no more exams!!!!!!!!!!!!! no need to panic like idoits..hahahaha...peace and freedom at last...YAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!=)

today is our last paper and it is easy???? i dunno quite ok..hahaha anyway,i have to satay back in school for about an hour for project work presentation..the webpage one...and my group totalli screw it man...our webpage was atrocious....damn malu....but nevermind...finally we are done with it. We totalli flunked our pw...prepare to see a 'f' grade in there...=0

I went out with queenie,jojo,tracce and jen. We wanted to go to junction8 at first and then cuz it is too far so we went to plaza sing. hahaha....when we reached there, we wanted to buy the movie tickets for corpse bride. Then when we reached that level where the cinema is located, the queue is so0ooo long....so we decided to have lunch. We ate at pastamania....and i bought a aglio oilo. Taste allright man taste allright....then we went back to the cinema level and the queue is still very long....but this time we decide to queue....but after a while, me jen and tracce got abit sian... so jen,me tracce went out of the queue and ask a guy selling popcorn for the number to call to order the movie tickets. and i called and since they want to charge an extra one dollar so we dun want. we queue up. and half way we got abit sian and me jen and jojo went to look around the place.By the time we came back...queenie and tracce are already out of the queue..and tey say corpse bride only left the ffront row...so tey dun want..and we snap back by saying why didn't u call us?? they didn't respond..and then at that moment me queenie and jojo and jen were distracted by the new hp trailer , the extended version...wow and we all stoof there transfixed to the screen..hahaha...after the advertisement is over...we discuss about what movie we want to watch and conclude to the skeleton key.....it starts at 2.15pm and we have to RE-QUEUE again...juz to get the tickets...man oh man....then after that we got alot of time. We have to walk to the other side of the level juz to get the escalator down and i saw a hp4 pop-up poster and man..i got mad and took a picture of it using tracce hp..hahaha...haven get it frm her yet..hahaha

then we went down to the level below it. i thought of going to take neo first but jen tracce and jojo want to see the cd shop so in the end queenie and i went to the neo level...and it was packed man....so we went back to look for the rest hahaha.....then after tracce bought her superstar cd...we went to world of sport as tracce want to find something...and the rest of us juz sat at the chair there talking crap.hahaha. Later we walk past comic connection and saw a x-box game where you actually can try to play. it is a car racing game. then tracce went to play and it was qute nice to see then later jen then queenie. It was so funny queenie kept cashing her car into pillars and stuff like that..hahaha and jen actually got addicted to it man...so funni....then when jen play quite nice to watch..hashaha..then there was 1 boy standing there watching her play( jojo and tracce went to 77th street)...jen fet bad so asked the boy if he want to play but the boy declined. so jen went to play again and again..then another boy came and watch jen play..hahahahaha...but jen didn't care juz play....after that we left....hahahah.....we walked around then later when we want to go the cinema,we walked past the shop but this time got people playing so we waited and waited then finally it was our time...jen played first and it was screwed man...then tracce played and got second...anf jen tried again but failed man....

In the cinema, tracce me,jen,jojo n queenie..we drew lots to see who sit where....hahaha...beside tracce got another group of people and they are very noisy and annoying..and so in the end she sit one row lower than us..alone...poor gurl....then during the movie,i kept screaming,using my hands to cover my eyes..i was dammed scared la...and jen say i was irritating cuz i kept holding her hand or accidentally pull her pinaform...hahahaha...we went to take neo after that...tracce didn't take say she dun take neo so me jen and jojoand queenie take..that will be my 4th time taken..(pathetic i noe....but not my fault,i stated taking neo one month ago) hahaha...and we take the sit-down one...hahaha so funni...nice man..hahahah...and then i dunno wad happent o me...like i lost all my adolescent i want to go home...and then they want to take another machine and i dun want so in the end they never take....my fault sori guys......

Queenie bought a funni toy for jojo and jen as birthday present.....jojo got angry that she is buying for jen so she and tracce stormed off while jen me and queenie were at the cashier...i didn't even say goodbye to jojo....but today is fun man............

Yeah!!!....tmr i am going out.....=)

2005-10-07T11:00:00.000+08:00

hey...time flies so fast..it's the exams period again! it is so annoying...have to study and study and memorise and memorise....my brain is about to burst!!!!hahaha............not that bad....

today i have my maths paper 2 exam....it is kinda simple??? i dunno..so far i know i lost 5 marks....eeew..i dun wanna compare anymore...it's allrite...there is alwaes paper 1 to pull you up.i am supposed to study geog today...got a whole lot of info to memorise which is like oh no!!!!
and tmr i shall memorise science which is another headache. So busy so little time.....

yesterday i went to xr's house to study maths..hoping she will teach me...yupp she did but i tink i totalli waste my time there. but that's allrite....i still study in the end. i ate spagetti at her house...then we started talking...then i started praticing my maths asd her geog. I kept asking her question so funni...so funni...her sister tmr have PSLE chinese, she like slack like that..dun care like that...realli admire her..tmr is her PSLE examination and she like not scared? hahahaha...weird man weird....her youngest sister came home complaining she is very sad..wanted to seek solace in the both sisters. And of course they did comfort her. It was about some friendship problem in school. It is parallel to what is happening in sec sch isn't it? Backstabing and betraying ad all that. Sigh* why is it like that???

2005-09-15T23:04:00.000+08:00

hello everyone, it seems a long time since i last update. One of the reasons cause the blog is spoilt...let's see if i can mend it. =) hahaha aneway sooooooo many things has happen in my life... let me share with you..

On wed, i stayed back with yvonne and we had hell lot of fun...yvonne was so funny ...asin she does her things is really weird. She is so messy. She put all her worksheets scattered around the table..which is realli messy..then after that she was packin up and found a photocopy card. She didn't knew who's was it so she returned to the libraian. After we left the library, she then remembered that it was hers and went back to the library to get it. Lucky for her, the libraian returned it to her. blur man blur..hahaha..Then we hang out at tiong and we go on seperate ways...

well today....it is super fun....realli fun..the whole sec2 cohort went to watch the movie"March Of The Penguin" at cathay. So we were dismissed at 12.45pm .ms sim delayed us...we were planning to go to heeren Marche to have lunch. Afraid that we will have inadequate time to eat, we took a cab. While waiting, manda,jenni and may cut the queue and got on the cab before us even though we came there first. then jenni was laughing all the way. Bloody hell... nevermind, so we waited. in the end, yvonne, me and jojo managed to flag one cab and we tld him to take us to heeren cause we are suppose to meet the rest there. The driver didn'yt know where was it end up fetching us to bugis..to bring us to the old cathay cinema (we wanted him to take us there first). I was like super pissed cause time is realli running out. then we told him it was at orchard and he still didn't know where was it. he gave us the excuse that it was his first day at work and he is 61 years old so can't think properly. We were like we don't care. Finally. he managed to get us to our destination. The fare was like 10+. we argued with him to pay only 6 bucks. Yeah..he gave in.=) he seemed like he was afraid of us cause yvonne was like cursing and swearing the whole journey. hahaha...then we rejoined them : pam lim, queenie, clasandra, yan sin, yue tong, me, yvonne , jojo, tracce, luvenia. yupp we ate ..the bill was eye-widening,hahaha. We were super late to meet our class. Supposed to meet at 1.45pm..we reached there at 1.15pm. hahahaha..we ran all the way from heeren to cine. hahahaha..so tiring can... we watched the show. After that, me,clasandra,jojo,yan sin, may went to heeren to "walk walk". hahaha..we took neoprints and it was like damned funni for me cuz it is my first time. then when i flinched, the camera will clicked and i look so damned weird..hahaha...i tink it is sooo fun... Then we went to tangs..to help jojo to find a shaver for his father's birthday. found one..then we went to take alook at the perfumes. We went to the DKNY booth and he gave us the apple perfume for ladies sample and i bet we smelt good the rest of the day...hahahaha today is damned nice...i want more of this days please..=)

2005-09-06T15:32:00.000+08:00

hello again....i like never update my blog likse for like so many days...so many things has been happening in my life..transforming me to a mad woman??? hahahaha

This is so sad....i like caught the flu bug so now i am like recovering from flu and fever...it is awful to have fever man...the pain in your head is soooooooooo excruciating that one can die....My oh My....i remembered on sunday night( the night my chinese oral), i woke up in the middle of the night, to go for a pee. When i returned to bed, i don't know if i am dreaming anot, i could hear many voices, talking to me, and there is one 'prominent' voice, commanding me to do things her way which is like i am suppose to carry oil in pipes or was it there were pipes around me...i can't remember...it was so horrible....and i was so hot damn night, i dunno why...when i switched on the air-con for about 10 mins, i was freakin cold. so i switched off. And that's was really weird. There was like another voice in my head, maybe the imagginery voice i dunno, commanding me not to turn my body to face the other side of my room. I dunno what's lurking there but when i tried to turn, my body would'nt bludge. It was so real. Then it happened like this the whole night. and i remembered when i woke up again, the air-con was on and it was cold that means i on it for quite some time yet i don't remember turning it on. This is so freaky. And then i dunno suddenly i thought to myself how can this be happening to me. When a person wakes up in the middle of the night, he/she is uppose to be alone with no other person. But in my case, it was different. As i thought this to myself, i can feel that i am becoming cooler and cooler. And i dunno why i conclude that i am on the last layer. and going on to the top layer which is cold and i
can shop. And when i was at the last layer, it was so damn hot and i have to link pipes so the oil can flow. I know it doesn't make sense but it is true. I also can remembered that my bed is divided into 2. I was sleeping at the left side known as the red side. and the othr side is blue. And i imagined? 2 persons from the top layer goin to the last layer. I am like thinking all this in my bed. It was so freaky. And alot of weird things happen to me on my bed. This is so weird man. The next morning when i woke up, my eyes were bloodshot and i was crying but i dunno why. This is so weird and freaky. Is something happening to me or issit a clue to someything forbading goin to happen to me???

Can somebody just save me from this horrible nightmare and let me lived peacefully? Rescue my soul and set me free...

I sometimes wonder why I was spared.
Spared the monster of the detox
Why there was no coma, no death
I wonder how I said I am done, and did for love
Then I realize I was not spared
The devil left me to pick up the ruins I had caused while in his grasp
I was left here for the black hole, and thoughts I could not go on
To sit and wonder who had it worse?
Me to fight or those who perishedI pray for mercy,
for the things I didI pray for peace in my heart againI realize I was not spared
The monster leaves some of us to feel the pain of the ruin we have left
Or is it God that sent his angels to save meI ask why meI know only one answerTo help,
to help save the innocentInnocent like I once was
Before I lost my halo
So I do God’s work, but the monster gets pleasure in my pain
The pain of lost love, beat up friendships,
and relationships that detached from me
I ask for mercy, and forgiveness,
but I think this is a long ride

2005-08-31T12:46:00.000+08:00

Ahhh today...we celebrated teacher's day and the whole programme sux..technician difficulty..so it screwed up the whole thing man....it was quite boring...my class held a party for Ms Ng..yupp didn't like it though...not very successful....and MS NG finally gave us back our geog paper after like so long...and yupp that was the last subject i need to know for my grades....which make me got 4As which is quite bad for me..not say very good like that...alot of people got alot of As.....

After that,i went home....and then i slept and slept and slept..then at 1+ i went to xr's house and had fun..lots of fun....hahahahaha...i recalled when i reached her house..i was damned moody..dunno why ..and then her appearance brighten up my life also dunno why?..maybe too lost didn't see each other....used her comp...and wrecked the internet system....hahahaha...fun man....do to ares and download songs...went to quizilla and take stupid quizzes...went to friendster for fun...hahahaha...played stupid game called habbo..cuz we were realli bored after a while...and disguise as guys and hahahaha we had fun....didn't know being a guy was so fun...hahahahaha.....one day can make more than 10 friends and the best part is we didn't even talk to them...they juz keep on adding us....so fun....not like a girl..sadis man....hahahahaha=) But it was fun overall..fun man fun....hahahahaha...want to do that again....hahahahaha....nice diguising a guy....hahahaha....

yupp..left after that....then life was boring...then at 10pm i watched MAD MAx2...so interesting...hqahahahaha...violent and everything....i din't know last time these Americans were like that...so wild and crazy....i am glad know that the society has become a more matured world...intelligent place to live...not like the past where everyting was chaotic and simply mad!!!!!hahahaha...boy..am i glad to be born in this world....LUcKy me~=)

2005-08-25T19:57:00.000+08:00

hahahahaha.....feel so good....SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!hahahahaha=)+)=).....WHY??? Cuz i studied finish my science syllabus that were be tested for the CA....i feel so good...So..GoOd...hahahaahahaha

lame man me...nothing better to know....decide to go online....yea..chat..chat..chat..only....aiya....im so freakin bored man....school iis borng....my life is so boring...how i wish someone will come into my life and shattered the monotonous.....im soo sick and jaded(yupp priscilla...that's the word-))....

today i miss the nations 4 day 1 tournament....aiya...spore got participate...women and men...
i dun care...shyt..mother cum back....

2005-08-22T13:51:00.000+08:00

hey..hey...it was a long time before i actualy write a post...oh man...it has been many days since i last update...so many things has happened...so many.....so much....

let me first say about hockey....the c'div team came in 3rd this year which is like so good...yeah!!!!well done well done!!!!=)=)=) we overcome all our fear and managed to reach third...though we didnt reach finals..but that's okae..it is a big improvement since last year...=)
Well done everyone..gd job....=)=)=)

Oh yeah..on thursday....went to delta to watch the finals for girls and boys..also for the prize presentation at 6....for girls..it was sengkang VS st nicks...i supported sengkang...yupp even though they did their best....they still loose to st nicks....For boys..it was R.I VS sengkang...yupp...i supported r.i....no not mny me....my whole team....and they comment some er..weird comments..yupp..n we witness some er..weird actions on the pitch....but i am not sayin any....(i noe i am evil! but tt is private)....yupp.Although R.I put up a strong fight..but stil loose to sengkang...nvm..can try harder....=)

On fri....commited a sin....never go for training....i am like so dead...-_-....cause i went to watch movie with tracce...at great world....wanted to watch the maid...time slot not right....end up watch must love dogs....borin romantic comedy....tracce was like complainin....it was sick man...sick...guess the movie din't turn out as we expected it to be...

sat..nthing much man...nthing....

n today...changed a new blogskin....wantd something carefree...didn't want to b a saddis..haahaha.....n rachel help me to look for the song i wanted..thnx a bunch=)....i like searched for soooo long ....cannot find....then she fing can....wad is this man???? aiya....

Thank you for opening a door for me,
Having a desire to share your joy,
A teacher gives much more than thought and skill,
Nor is her heart the least she might employ,
Knowing well the rules of esctasy.

You are yourself the lesson we deploy,
Owning all the passion of your will,
Unraveling in ourselves your mystery....

2005-07-17T18:11:00.000+08:00

hey...wow..what a hectic day i had...i am still veri tired...boy..what have i done today???..hark!!! it's time to refresh my memory...

Last night, i set alarm to wake up at 7.30am although i slepht like 2+...have to do tuition homework and school homework....well...the alarm did ring at at 7.30am and i stop it but i went back to sleep...hahaha..then i slept and slept and impromptily i jumped out of bed and check my watch...thnx God...only 8.15am..i went to clean myself and start to do my work at 9.00am...None of my family members woke up yet.

Had breakfast at 11.30am..damn hungry..can eat a whole cow if you ask me....haha..so after eating my breakfast..went to read newspaper then went out for lunch at 12.30pm....after lunch went to tuition at 1.15pm..ant then at 3.30pm i came home..and start doing the shyty home econ brochure...it's takin up my time..i am so busy already..haven't do my tommorow eng tuition homework yet..dunno how to do the stupid essay....aiya..i think i at night then do....

I bought the Harry Potter and Half-Blood Prince book yesterday..Hooray!!! I went to Borders and purchased it at 10.45am...lucky me..they give me this exclusive Harry Potter paper book in collaboration with the release of the new harry potter book...Yay!!!...yesterday at 11.00pm when i went to Borders again..to buy something..they stop giving the bag....i am so lucky..wadeva man..wadeva man....hahaha

Started reading the book but have not finished yet...seem long-winded to me AGAIN..dunno why....mayb i am sick of all these wizardry world and obseession with it....it is juzt another er...imaginery world...So i shall stop getting obsese with Harry Potter anymore...!!!!hahahaha

2005-07-15T16:11:00.000+08:00

hey!!!what a day i had man....Totally temperamental day...sadness..happiness...dissapointment...confusion....annd then sadness again....then more sadness...=(

Kick start the day with some stupid Maths lesson..boo so boring....yupp super boring....luckily i sit at the back..can talk....heehee....then we had English...suppose to have debates...end of doing english comprehnsion...so boring...sick and tired of it....it the end still got it done....=)

After eng, we had recess...i went to the library not to study(i am not a nerd!!!) but to look for yesterday's newspaper to find some idoictic article..hahaha..couldn't find it..very dissapointed....later was science....super boring....did 2 experiments on horrible PHYSICS-electricity...ultra-boring...experiments fail to brighten the day....had small conversations with my science partner..Lulu..yupp then we had dance.....

For dance..i was suppose to find a partner like same height as me....but t=my partner i got..Catherine...she is sooo freakin tall.....but of course i am not that short and working with her is pretty smooth=)...Ms Queenie taught us some dance steps and yupp...that's kind of it....

Last period of the day...our class got in to the finals for lit-on-stage...some literature drama,play thingy...yupp..we perform...our class put in alot of effort...rehersing and rehersing....Our efforts were paid off....we won 2nd..loss to 2E...nevermind..can try harder=)

Our class dancethon tthingy...suppose to perform last friay but they postponed it to this week...yupp they perform...not bad..we clinched the second....lose to 2E AGAIN!!!!

Went for a match at NTU...didn't play..waste time...u noe why??? cuz the weather didn't want to co-operate with us..There was lightning and thunder....my oh my....unfortunately it was postponed...to God's known when....i was drenched and super cold...=(

i dunno what t say about You...You changed so much...Where have your sweet and kind attitude gone to???Ehy are you giving me this can't be bothered look??? I dun understand why you changed so much??? Your attitude so cold to me...It's not like i offend you or someting...Why are you doing this to me???You know it's very painful and wobesgone...Why must you guys gossip??? Gossip,gossip,gossip...discussing bad things about me...Why can't you just say it straight into my face...Gossip and gossip....Does it do any good to me???WIll i changed if no one tells me what's going on??? You think it is nice to start this rubbish??? What if i repeat my mistakes like what i did to May....Do you want to try ...If you find it so amusing...

On a happier note....today...5 hours later will be the release of te 6th harry Potter book...wow....i can't wait to get my hands on the book and start reading...i bet i will be totalli engrossed in the book...hahahaha=)

Love is like the wild rose-brair;
Friendship is like the hollow-tree.
The holly is dark when the rose-brair blooms,
But which will bloom more constantly?

The wild rose-brair is sweet in spring,
Its summer bloom scent the air;
Yet wait till winter comes again,
And who will the wild-brair fair?

Then,scorn the silly rose-wreath now,
And deck thee with holly's sheen,
That,when December blightsthy brow,
he still may live the galand green.

P.S thnx Tracce for lending mr your shorts on thrusday....hahaha thnx=)

2005-07-12T15:26:00.000+08:00

Hey...wad a funny day i had today....hahahahaha...let me comment about it....+)=)+)

Today...right school sux and i slept during Chinese AGAIN...not my fault...teacher was realli boring....boo...then comes the funny part....During art...we had to go to the computer labs to do some photoshop thingy..yupp it was boring..i nearly fell alsleep...yupp fun part is when we finished what we suppose to do and can do our work that period of time....many funny tnings happen..hahahaha

I shall not mention names..it's kind of embarrasing for the victims....Lala was caught looking at the ACS webpage...and the art teacher announced it to the whole class...hahaha..wad a good laugh we had=)..That's not all...Mary was caught writing a new post for her blog..caught red-handed...bad luck for Mary...The art teacher took control of her blog and went to type his own post and publish it...Boo!...what funny things he mention...All of us were like crowding around mary reading what the art teacher type...hahaha..To make matter worst...the Art teacher did not only write one post but two!!!...and the second one he nearly reveal Mary's big secret....Hahahaha...but it was all very entertaining...How i wish everyday was like that!!!!=)

then i had training in school...started at 3.30pm...sad thing is it is physical training....Blah!..we had to run and run and run....do sit ups...do push ups...and blah blah..i was totalli exhausted by the end of it....Anyway, it ended at 5pm..Man!..it was poring cats and dogs....stilll got to go home...Luckily, wasn't drenched...Yeah!!!=0

(NO POEM TODAY..+))

2005-07-09T17:00:00.000+08:00

oh wow!!!...What a day i had...Man.....i am so tired....yupp..lets recall what we did today.....hahahahaha=)

okae...i woke up late.....so skip ballet....then went for training....dunno wad's wrong with me....hate myself man....the stupid ball won't seem to move...no matter how hard i hit....idoitic man...y am i like this....i want to be like the pros....I WANT!!!

After training...i watched 4 mayb 20 mims of a hockey match....then i went to prata cafe with Lyn li,Rahwani,Rahmuna,Elizabeth. i followed them cause i didn't know the fastest way back to tiong...Lyn li going to the bukit merah interchange... i want to follow her..dunno why??...so i have to wait for them to finish eating the prata...they were worried that they don't have enough money to pay for the meal...but they had....hahaha....i drank some lime juice from Eli...she was not happy about that....later i went to but one myself and she was like....i tink u should give me some...it was so funny...=)...then...iwhen we were leaving the shop....i said i feel like throwing away the lime juice and Eli was like dun i want....give me....okae...greedy Eli!!! hahahaha

I skipped tution cause i thought after trainin i could go home and do homework....i guess it was a wrong mistake..i wasted my whole afternoon...Boo....=(

Ohya..Aashna..yesterday was your birthday.....happy Birthday Aasha....May you stay happi alwaes....hahahahaha=)

A welcomed onslaught of sunlight,
radiant,from every direction;
points of light forming the girl
glory,from the corner of an eye;
inner beauty reflecting out;surrounding
call it what you will
metaphors were invented
for those like her
but none volunteer
too scared to try.

I suspect she stores
her beauty within those
eyes of hers
those deep thoughtfuls
that inevitably
labyrinth and lose:
that exhilirating special 'lost',
when you can't stop laughing,
and don't care whenther or not
you don't stay there forever.

2005-07-07T22:08:00.000+08:00

Aiyah....i know i didn't update this for so damn long cause evertime i update it i feel so tired..but today dunno why not tired...so can update..i am going to record down for my past 3 days what's happening to me...
7/7/05
Today....school was boring...i slept during science....dunno wad's wrong with me....feel like sleeping all the time....Hahaha..not now...dunno why???...and yup our group finally finished the Statistic poster within 90 minutes?!...Kool huh? That was like so fast cause Ms Ng didn;t come ...got free period...infact two free period...so decided to maximise whatever i am doing...yupp so complete...Nvm....that is not my main focus....
Oh ya...today is Jeslyn Tan's birthday...Happy Birthday Jes!!!....May you stay happy and er cheerful always...and may all your wishes come true....especially the u noe one....Hahahaha+)
Oh ya...we had video session with danker today after school....he gave us some tips on tmr match with yu hua sec...veri damned scared....scared i cannot hit properly ....BuT....kind Priscilla Wong decided to help me out....We praticised at the playground there...and it was so annoying because these little toodlers just ran here and there and in front of me and everywhere...Aren't thet afraid their neck will be wacked off by the hockey stick if i accidentally raise my stick when they standbehind me???.....Don't they want to live???....Anyway....so we pratisied from 6-7.20pm then pris need to go for tuition and i say goodbye and blah blah......It was fun...I regain my confidence ....I will do it tommorow....Watch me Jes!!!!

6/7/05
Well...what happened???Oh i remember now...i slept during Chinese period.....and the teacher saw me sleeping and didn't say a thing..okae...what kind of teacher this is??? nvm....then after school is where the fun starts...hooray!...Clasandra and i stay stay back to do our statistic poster in the library....WE WERE SO PATHETIC THAT WE HAD TO BORROW CONSTRUTION PAPER AND MARKERS FROM CLAS FRENDS....they were willin to help us.....and we laughed and laughed....hahahaha..Yan Sin came with us too....She need to do her debate thing....i helped her=)....Then we weny home around 5 sumting.....yupp we talk all day.......U THINK IT IS FUNNI TO MAKE FUN OF PEOPLE'S NAME AND LAUGHED AND MIMICKED IT IN A FUNNI MANNER U THINK IT IS ENTERTAININ....U R NOTHING BUT A DAUGHTER-OF-A-BITCH.....LAUGH LAUGH LAUGH....ATTENTION SEEKER!!!!

5/7/05
Hooray....Hooray......We won the first match against Evergreen sec...today....Horay....what a good headstart we have for the c'div 11 a-side tournament.....But Danker told us it is no big deal to win a school like them.....we will have to face more challenging teams....and to get in the top 4....we must even work harder.....i am willing to do that to improve my skills.....never give up!!!!There is hope for me....I see the hope.....hahahahahaahaha....but realli well done c'div!!!!!

P.S No poem today..feeling jaded..=(

2005-06-30T15:08:00.000+08:00

Today is a sad....sad....sad day....i want to apologise to all the people that i offended....during training....i let your down today....i know i dissappoint your today....i am veri sorry....

People who i offended
1)Jeslyn Tan
2)Ramona
3)Lim Singh
4)Jennifer Yeo
5)The Hockey Team

To jeslyn--i know today training i did realli v.bad. I know you are mad at me and want to chop off my head,squeeze my eyeballs,twist my arms(you told me). I am veri sorri jes....i dont know what got me....i juzst don't feel right today for training...i didn't focus...and because of that i can't do the basics at all....i can't hit a flat and accurate ball,can't stop a ball using forestick...I am so sori....jes...i know you are veri angry at me..i am realli sori....jes....don't worry i will work harder and willl prove to you i can hit a accurate and flat ball....I will work on it....i will sharpen my skills...trust me....i don't want to let you down....you were always there for me....i want you to give me another chance....i promise i will change....more skilfull to....as long as i never give up hope....i can always succeed....

To ramona--i am so sorri that i have to make you run for almst every ball whenever i try to hit to jes....it wasn't accurate at all that's why...and some more you are only a sec1 yet i made you run...i am veri grateful to you that you did not even nag at me when ever you have to run to get my ball for jes...thank you....and sori for making you run so much today..So sori....

To lim singh--i am so sori for steping on your feet today for trainin...you look so piss....i am so sori....but you know accidents happen all the time....yea...i just want you to be forgivable...yea...so sori too...

To jen--i am so sori...i know you are realli piss at me today for training....you call me to pass you a ball...i choose to push and the ball went haywire.....it went to another direction...and after that...you look quite frustrated at me....i am so sori jen...i know you are worried for me...you want me to improve my skills like shit like that before the c'div....i know by today's training session..you were veri dissapointed at me..C'div is less than a week and i am like nowhere....don't worry jen...trust me ....i will improve ...i will prove to you i can hit a flat and accurate ball...i will not give up...i will change my strategy and try again...Don't lose your faith in me....I am not going to dissapoint you...

To the hockey team--i want to apologise to the c'div team....i know all of your are pros and i am like er so not incomparatable with your....i know i don't play well..and give your alot of worries....i am veri sorri....i shouldn't even be worrying your...we should be by now veri confident with all of our work....know where to run and everything and of course know the game rules well..but yet i don't seem to achieve that..soi will have confusement...thus making you guys realli mad at me...i am so sorri....i will try my best to improve on all these and hopefulli everyting go well for our team...i will not dissapoint your...i am going to work on it....i must ....i will not let your down....i don't want to....

Yupp...these are the prople i want to apologise to....i am realli sori....honestly sori....sori....sori...realli sori....

If you listen...
just a little closer
and if you would stay...
just a moment longer
You might be able to hear
these drops of regret
fall into the bucket
And you might be able to see
these drops of sweet 'sorry'
filling up the bottle
I told myself this is
no fault of my own
and blame it on you fear
on being alone
but if i bring you...
just a little closer
and if i could hold you...
just a moment longer
I might be able to take back
those drops of regrets
and empty that bucket
And i may be able to soak up
those drops of sweet 'sorry'
and break open that bottle
We made this fariy tale
into a very short sorry
You deserved a much better ending
and for this...
I am very very sorry...

2005-06-28T23:15:00.000+08:00

hi again=).....yupp...that's what i am going to do....infact now.....i am going to type out what happen today.....alot of events happen....yupp....it is worth reading,typing,wasting time on...hahaha

Right...i shall begin...today wore contacts to school..hate the stupid outlandish specs alot...it is a freak...totally hindratic.....yupp....most of my classmates are like okae u are puttin on contacts now....and i am like yea....-_-.....okae then we have assembly....sing the national anthem....then have the usual routine...prayers...and blah blah....i am not insulting or somethin...no intention!!!...Halfway....Queenie was like cruthing her stomach and i poked her back...hehehe...and her face was like crumpled with agony.....and ahe grumbled she have a stomach pain...i was like okae...it seems that after she have her stomachace....she lost all her adolescent....becomes like a helpless corspe....no more bubbly character....she was low the whole day....poor girl....but she was strong....i admire you...=)

Okae....enough on Queenie....right every morning they will say the announcement..and today...suprisingly happi?....My maths techer didn't come not only that my project work techer also didn't come....Hooray!!! not only i miss maths but also CME and PW....Yeah.....the sad thing a relief teacher has to take us and they were damn boring....During PW....a relief techer got in..and asked us to do our own work....and Clasandra,me,Lulu and Michelle discuss about our Maths Statistical poster....We haven;t startd on it yet...Ohno!....yea...and we were discussin the question for the survey.....i wrote all the possibilitiesdown in my fullscape.....yea...and u noe when we write we will like fold the cover page to the back....Guess what did Clasandra do with my cover page???...Well, it like broke....i was mad at Clasandra for like spoiled MY belonging...Can i have a compensation??...No...you will have....Then for maths....we went some funni old hag class....didn;t know the teacher's name....yea..i dunno why she kept half her class lighted on and half the class 'fanned' up....Man...she was weird....like i say an old hag....No offence here....Sry...=(

Cme was boring..didn't teach...did our own things...i did my mindmaps...Lulu went to talk to michelle....yupp...boring then we had chinese....Oh my freakin hell.....CHINESE is such a chore!!!! not say i dn't like Chinese but it was really bad....i mean the teacher is realli boring...honestly....he didn't get my attebtion at all...yupp..i slept through....BAd Girl!!!=p and he is suppose to teach me chinese or the rest of the year...i thinki am going to flung my Chinese...Hmmmph!!!

ARt was interesting???we went to Cyberspace i think (computer lab) and did our Art..We have to come up with designs to design the MTV logo sign ....some competition we are particpating...yupp...so we gulliblely went to yahoo images to search for ideas on how to design the MTV logo...yupp type in some VERY DECENT keywords....yupp...yahoo..in response gave me some R-rated pic...i was like OMG!...Jes went to show Jen er...not veri amusing pic...about some woman...yupp...jen she claimed did not intentionally enlarge the pic ...it was an accident....And our ARt teacher was like "what you think you are doing?" and the whole class burst into laughter....hahahaha...how entertainin!!!=)...yupp...so be careful eaht you type as your keywords in yahoo search....WORDS CAN BE DECISIVE....hahahaha

Yup...school ended off like that..you can say a pretty well amusing day for me....yupp....and then the trainin part....Yupp..i didn't bring my stick to school so i was like there is trainin in school today? I only knew about the one 6-7 at CCAb...yea nvm....so i got scared... and i stayed back until 3.. there is no trainin...false alarm...Ying gave me my M.I.L.K run shirt...yupp...i am runnin...yupp..so the day ended like that for me....Went home did more studying...honestly....yupp.....until now i am typing this post...yupp..Ta-Da!!! I am done....Yeah!!

As the day fades and the night calls,all i think of is you
As the owls calls lead into the birds sweet morning chirps,all i can think of is you
While the bear hybernate and the summer comes to an end,i'm still thinking of you
As we bring in the new year with a bang,guess who i 'm thinking of?
You
Since 1991 till the day i die the only person i will always think of and i miss you

dedicated to everyone that i loved...yupp..to everyone i know...my friends,classmates,family...to the whole world...

2005-06-24T16:08:00.001+08:00

Well,if you ask me what happen today.... Only one poems says it all.....It entitles May Our Friendship Last Forever

May our friendship last forever;
May i sail upon your sea.
May we go through life together;
may there always be a 'we'.

May i be your endless sky;
May you breathe my gentle air.
May you never wonder why;
Each time you look for me,i am there.

May we be for each a smile
Like the warm,life-giving sun;
Yet when are in pain awhile,
May our suffering be one.

May we share our special days,
The happinessof one for two;
And if we go seperate ways,
Let my love remain with you.

Well, this poem is dedicated to all my friends who have cared for me. I never like mentioning names so i will skip that part. Yupp....that's all today that makes my day significant today....because of you all....=)

2005-06-24T16:08:00.000+08:00

2005-06-23T23:53:00.000+08:00

2005-06-23T15:07:00.000+08:00

Well, today alot of events have taken place. let me tell you wad happen today starting from the morning. this is going to be super borin but who cares??? if not i will have nothin to write... Hahahaha=)

Let's take a trip down memory lane...let's start with after breakfast. Read the newspaper....took out my chinese tb, prepare to study... fell asleep...woke up again....stare at the book.....then fell asleep again...woke up again....eat lunch.....after lunch try to get back studyin...cannot concentrate....end up playin with cousin.....went to spike his hair with water.... We had so much fun....Everytime,i finished one side of the hair.....the other side will drop....so it became like a routine....hahahahaha.......then i finalli got everytin done....all nice and neat....not neat? his hair stood like needles you noe....hahahaha.....well, it did look pretty good on him....except we both knew that our grandma is going to kill us both if she finds his hair lyke that...so after playin wif his hair....he went to comb it down again.....into a hairstyle like mummy's boy.....decent in disguise;)......after that i went for trainin.....

today for trainin,we have alot of fun...frustration....anger and lerthartgicness.....well that is for me.....i dunno what the other's think about today's trainin......i am seriously veri exhausted.....neraly died after that but it is worth it.....I gain a new experience once again....yeah!!!!! I like today;s trainin although i was veri tired after that.....I still enjoy it....

Why did you change? What did i do?
We were like brothers,and now
Your face is a wall wthout windows,while you
Abrogate what small claims you allow.

I don't understand what undid the sweet bond
That for years yielded nothing but joy.
I am who i was,and yet you respond
As though it were y aim to annoy.

Perhap's there no why when some untoward wind
Whips away what hold to our hearts.
Though bitter it be to leave loved ones behind,
it remains the most precious of arts.

2005-06-22T15:15:00.000+08:00

Well, today not much happen. Life still has been boring, doing nothing but studyin again... I hardworkin?? no, it wad cuz of the course i went to.... We MUST BE COMITTED TO ACHIEVE YOUR DREAMS!!!yup....but the sad thing is i can't concentrate for long.....my desire to pick up the phone grows, the hunger to sms overwhelmed me..... It seems that i am er mad??? Hahahaha=)

I am not mad, not happi but sad.... So sad, that it seems that the sorrow seems to wash away my cheerfulness.... I can't do anything right..... I dunno wad is goin on??? Can somebody shine a light through and rescue me out of this place??? I hate it here.... I am lost like i am stuck in a remote island all by myself....lost there forever.....stuck there my entire life....keeping me accompany only the sound of crashing waves and the rustling of coconut trees and the soft and fine sand.....Nobody else live there..... i am all alone.....i can feel the pain, the frustration in myself.... evertime i try to scream....all i here is my echo....Does anybody know i am here??? Where are my friends when i need them??? Where are my family???? Where? Where? Where??? It looks like nobody cares for me, i was only living in their exixtance(sheep).... no one miss me.....no one came for me....and everytime i thought of this....tears began to form in my eyes.... I ask myself this question? Is there realli no one will care for me? no one will look for me? No one to free me?? And when i opened my eyes.... I could only stare in disbelief that it was a nightmare...But what if it becomes reality??? Oh no.... I hope that will never happen... I want my friends....

Not by mind and not by power
I shall endure the coming hour
So faith does leave my soul i pray
So far i walked but so i fade
And nobody doubt i still believe
That if i ask i will receive
On Eagle's wing i take flight
Appear to meet abandance's night
Upon the rock i plant my feet
To grow was the master to succed
Upon the whines i made my request
And in my fraility i am blessed
For my sins his body was cord
And by his strength i am restoed
But the same old body still remains
Upon the clothe or yet this day
And though is sad i am reborn
The edge of me is still it's thorn
And of course i ask if i earn my wrong
Until the weakness i am strong

2005-06-21T16:04:00.000+08:00

yo guys,
x.r is so rude.
i just ask her for help on the first post,she ended up helpin me to write a post!!!
How bad can she be???Hahahahaha=)

WEll,she says i can't kill her and i tell you i an! She loves to brag about how strong she is. Asif she is! hahaha. She becomes so emotional....

Anywae, this is my first post and i think it sux!!! X.r didn't tell me that this skin was the ond version. How bad can She be???. hahaha
Life has been boring for me....infact bored to deathe=(. I have been lazing around doing like nothing??? Yup...got training at 5, but not going. Got tuition at 7.30pm... I am such a bad girl. C'div is coming and i am not going for training??? Oh dear...

Her feelings she hides.

Her dreams she can't find.

She's losing her mind.

She's fallen behind.

She can't find her place.

She's losing her faith.

She's fallen from grace.

She's all over the place.

Yeah,oh.

She wants to go home, but nobody's home.

It's where she lies, broken inside.

With no place to go, no place to go

to dry her eyes.Broken inside.

2005-06-21T15:58:00.000+08:00

hey people!
this is xiurong here
ona asked me to write the first post for her
HAHA SHE SO BAKA HOR

lolx, ok lashe is trying to kill me now
but since im such a strong person
i din get killed

HAHA FAT CHANCE ONAAAA

lol.

:PpP